What does the two-minute silence mean to a bereaved military child?
Every Remembrance Day, the country is asked to unite in a two-minute silence honouring and paying tribute to the sacrifice made by military personnel past and present. It’s a poignant time of year for the entire country, but for those bereaved military children supported by Scotty’s Little Soldiers – it can hold deep personal significance as they commemorate the life of their parent.
Every bereaved military child remembers differently, and the feelings they experience during Remembrance can vary hugely depending on their age, their understanding of the service their parent gave to their country and the way their parent died.
Here, some of Scotty’s members share what the two-minute silence means to them.
Scotty Member Luca-Beau honouring her dad
Austen (13)
"The two-minute silence is always very emotional. I usually cry. It's a moment to really think about everything, think about everyone who has put their life on the line for us and think about everyone we’ve lost.
"Most people realise how important Remembrance is, but I don’t think everyone gets how many people it still directly effects. A lot of people might not think about someone like my dad, who died by suicide, or it wouldn’t occur to them how personal Remembrance can still be for young people like me. Remembrance isn’t just about remembering the past, it’s about remembering all the people who are dying now, too."
Austen wearing his Scotty's top
Luca-Beau (9)
"Remembering with everyone else makes me quite happy because I know there’s lots of people thinking about my dad. It makes feel very proud."
Elizabeth (9)
"I like to think about the people we loved. It makes me feel a bit sad, but also happy because we’re actually remembering them."
Luca-Beau holding a doll of her dad, CSgt Jamie Pallister
Logan (12)
"Remembrance makes me feel really happy, but it's also quite hard for me sometimes. I'm really proud of my dad for what he did and it’s a good time to reflect on his bravery and the sacrifice he made for me and our country, but remembering him also makes me feel sad because he’s not here.
"At Remembrance, I would normally visit dad’s family and spend time with my grandparents. While I’m there we visit his grave and do the two-minute silence. I sometimes like to think that my dad is there with me. I like to see other people remember as well, as I know one of the people they’re remembering is him."
Logan and his mum at Remembrance
Erin (17)
"I look forward to Remembrance because I like going to the parades and thinking about my dad, but it also makes me angry because it seems like a lot of people just don’t care. They do their two minutes of silence then just carry on as normal. Some people don’t even do that."
Isabelle (8)
"At school we also do a two-minute silence where we’re really quiet and think about all the people who served in the military. The two-minute silence is really important so we can remember them all."
Isabelle and her sister Elizabeth
Ben (15)
"When I’m walking around school during Remembrance, I’ve heard a few people say stuff like, ‘why do we still have Remembrance when World War I and World War II were ages ago?’ I stopped a few of them and said it’s because there are still people today fighting for our country and dying because of it. But, because it doesn’t affect them, they don’t care. I just think you have all the other days of the year to mess around and do whatever you want. It's not even like it’s an entire day, it's only two minutes. There are so many people who this day means so much to. Just be respectful and think about all the people around you who may have lost someone."
Ben with a photo of his dad, WO2 Gary O'Donnell
Melissa (Scotty parent)
"It’s a sad two-minutes, but we try to think positively and keep the focus on how proud we are of Martin. After the Remembrance ceremony we all like to get a big meal at the pub and have a bit of fun."
Blakey (Scotty parent)
"Because of the timing, Remembrance can be a really difficult time for us. It’s a long two-minute silence, and since losing Sarah we’ve never managed to get through the whole thing without one of us crying and having to reassure each other. Despite how difficult we find it, I think it’s a great thing, especially for all the Scotty members who are able to remember their parents together. But yes, it’s a tough two minutes."
Melissa and her daughter, Rosie
Lennon (13)
"We have a Remembrance ceremony at school every year, where we take part in a two-minute silence and lay a wreath. I find it quite peaceful and it helps me think about everyone who has died and everyone else who has lost a parent that served in the military, like me.
"Everyone is normally really respectful and it’s a special time for lots of people, not just me. I’ve told some of my friends that I’m a member of Scotty’s and they all understand why Remembrance is so important to me."
Lennon standing by Scotty's memory tree at our 2022 Christmas party
Supporting bereaved military children
Scotty’s Little Soldiers is a military charity dedicated to supporting children and young people (0 to 25 years) who have experienced the death of a parent who served in the British Armed Forces.
Inspired by the experience of Army widow Nikki Scott, following the death of her husband Corporal Lee Scott in Afghanistan in 2009, the charity, which was set up in 2010, provides support and guidance to hundreds of bereaved military children and young people throughout their childhood.
Scotty’s currently supports over 650 members and services offered include access to child bereavement support, guidance to parents and carers, personal education and learning assistance (including grants), and fun activities such as holiday respite breaks and group events. These are all designed to remind the children and young people supported by Scotty’s that they are not alone.
If you know a child or young person who has experienced the death of a parent who served in the British Armed Forces, they could be eligible for specialist bereavement support from Scotty's Little Soldiers. Hundreds of bereaved military children aren’t getting the support they need but we are here to help.
If you know a bereaved military child who could benefit from Scotty’s Little Soldiers support, visit our Get Support page for more information.
Scotty members and parents walking in the London Remembrance Parade
