Hero of the month… Trooper Phillip Lawrence 1987 - 2009
Once a year in November the whole world comes together to remember our fallen heroes, however at Scotty’s Little Soldiers we know that for families who have lost someone who served in the Armed Forces, Remembrance Day is every day.
Every one of our members has lost a parent who served in the British Armed Forces, and we believe their lives and sacrifice should always be remembered. In our hero of the month posts we celebrate the lives of our members’ fallen heroes every month of the year.
This month we honour Trooper Phillip Lawrence, who was killed in Afghanistan on 27th July 2009. Trooper Lawrence from The Light Dragoon’s died whilst travelling in a combat vehicle in Helmand Province. His vehicle was struck by an IED and as the driver of the tank, he took the full force of the bomb when it set off, killing him instantly. He left behind his wife, Amy and eight-month-old daughter, Jessica.
A devoted husband, father and Liverpudlian, Phil enlisted in the Army in July 2005. After completing recruit training in January 2006, he conducted his Royal Armoured Corps training in Bovington before joining The Light Dragoons.
His first deployment to Afghanistan was in 2006, the same year he met Amy. He was then deployed on his second tour in 2009 and sadly never returned home.
Described as a talented, reliable, and dedicated soldier by his comrades, Phil, known also as Lenny, made a name for himself across the regiment for not only being a surprisingly good dancer, but simply being the most cheerful, helpful, and friendly person, you could hope to meet.
His Commanding Officer, Lieutenant Colonel Gus Fair, gave the following tribute at the time of his death. “Trooper Lawrence was one of the characters that make a family regiment such as The Light Dragoons so special. His generous nature, inability to bear a grudge and sheer enjoyment of day-to-day life endeared him to us all. Everyone counted him amongst their friends, and his loss will hit the regiment especially hard. He soldiered with great heart, shown both in the boxing ring and on the battlefield.
“Lenny was devoted to his family, and the pride he took in his wife and daughter shone from him. It fills me with enormous sadness that Jessica, his baby daughter, will not grow up to know her brilliant father.”
Recalling the day she was told that Phil wouldn’t be coming home, Amy vividly remembers her world suddenly turning upside down. She was at home nursing her baby daughter when officers arrived at her door. She recalls: “I just went into shock, Jess was just eight months old, and I didn’t know how to react, but for some reason I knew I needed to take the medals off Phil’s uniform before they took it away. He’d told me that.”
For Amy, the few years after Phil’s death were all very much a blur. Having only been together for three years before he died, Amy explains it took her four to five years to get her head straight and to make sure that Jess was happy. She explains “If I look back now, I can’t really remember anything else to be honest. You go from being married and having a family and making decisions together and then suddenly that person’s gone, and you don’t know which way to turn, where you’re going to live. It’s changed us an awful lot.”
At the time of his death, Jess was just eight months old and too young to understand what had happened to her daddy. Amy explains that she’s always been open and honest with Jess, who is now 12 years old, about how her daddy was killed.
The most frustrating thing for Jess over the years has not being able to remember him. Amy explains: “Jess gets frustrated because she can’t remember her daddy and she’s only got a few pictures of him with her. She only knows what people tell her of him. It’s little things like going to parents evening without both parents there, and when other children have their daddies visit who are firemen and policemen and she wants her daddy to go in as a soldier.”
As someone who lived life to the max, Phil took every opportunity he could to make those closest to him happy. A fun-loving character, Amy lovingly recalls Phil’s devotion to his family, she said: “Family was everything to Phil, especially Jess who he adored in the few short months he had her. His family and life in the Army were by far his greatest achievement.”
Aside from his family and Army career, Phil also had another passion - Manchester United, despite coming from Liverpool. Amy said: “He loved football but would try his hand at anything and always give 100%”. He was also a keen boxer and boxed for the Army boxing team.”
Amy has some loving memories of her time with Phil which she often shares with Jess. She fondly remembers seeing Phil’s face when Jess was born and holding her for the first time. She said: “He was smitten from the start and never wanted to let go, but to do his best for her and her future and make her proud.”
Talking about what she misses the most about Phil, Amy says is the fact that he was taken from her and Jess too soon and that he has missed out on watching his daughter grow up. She explains: “Phil and Jess are so alike they would have been two peas in a pod and stuck together at the hip. I miss that Jess has missed out and has no memories herself of the person and character Phil was, and for her to know how much he loved her.”
She also describes how she misses his fun, caring nature and infectious laugh, and the way he always tried to make people be happy. She said: “Phil was always so positive about life and just wanted the best for people.”
Growing up with no memories of her dad, Amy is determined to help build memories for Jess and every year the pair do something special for Phil’s anniversary. Amy said: “We always plan ahead and do something fun that day, whether it’s a day at his favourite place to go as a child, such as Chester Zoo, or we go away with family to make new fun memories that I know Phil would be proud of.”
Amy and Phil met the year he was first deployed to Afghanistan in 2006. The couple met on a night out, but because Phil was due to go on tour that year, they decided to stay friends. When Phil returned in 2007 the couple rekindled their relationship and married a year later. Phil was 19 at the time and Amy was 21.
Their daughter Jess came along in November 2008, just a few months before Phil was once again deployed to Afghanistan. Amy remembers: “Phil went to Afghanistan again in April 2009, he came home on his R&R in June and then went back out for a few more months, but he was killed before I got to see him again.”
Jess joined Scotty’s Little Soldiers in 2011, she was one of the youngest members to join just a year after it was established, and the charity has become a huge part of their lives. Amy said: “Scotty’s has been a lifeline, more so in the early days, and we’ve been made to feel part of such a special group, a family, that not many people get to be part of.”
Through Scotty’s, Amy and Jess have started making happy memories. Amy explains: “The main thing for me is knowing that Jess isn’t alone or forgotten. She has received so much support from Scotty’s over the years, from holidays away to birthday presents and vouchers on anniversaries. With Scotty’s you know there are a whole group of people there who understand exactly how you feel and will support you the best they can.”
Amy added: “Jess has made some great friends through Scotty’s over the years which has helped build her confidence. They all know what she’s going through, and they can all support one another. It’s the little things that make such a big difference to us.
“Jess has had some fantastic experiences thanks to Scotty’s. We were both invited to Norwich City Football Club and Jess walked on to the pitch before kick off with the match ball. This was a big moment for her, walking out in front of thousands of people but she thoroughly enjoyed it. She also got to meet other Scotty’s members. It was just really nice, all the children of all different ages. We love Scotty’s and it’s not just Jess, it’s helped me a lot as well because I’ve met a lot of friends who are also widows and they really understand.”
